longslowaccident: (Default)
Am I the only one that finds it hilarious that one of our ~tips~ on how to increase productivity when we start working from home is "have Jerry Springer on in the background"?



(need shiny for contest~)
longslowaccident: (Default)
Soon to be major plus-side of working at home: I will no longer have to listen to all of the middle-aged women around me yammering every second of every day. Today, they talked for twenty minutes on what colour each of their ceilings were in each room of their houses. WHY.

And then they wonder why they can barely make productivity. I hardly ever say anything, and have never even come close to being in danger of not making the productivity cut-off. These co-workers have also repeatedly lamented that they're going to be so bored and so lonely when having to work from home. OH DEAR GOD, WE MIGHT GET SOME WORK DONE, TOO. Me, I'm worried about my productivity going down, with all of the distractions at home (mostly Emmy and the TV). I guess we shall see.


btw I feel it's safe to note that the galaxy will implode if I don't get laundry folded tonight. and that I'm buying a bottle of vodka (along with two new, tightly claspable cat collars) when I pick Emmy up from daycare.
longslowaccident: (Default)
Whoo, four hours of sleep. I was up until after one, mostly because I thought maybe, just maybe, [livejournal.com profile] lilenth could be reasoned with. Nope! I saw I had another comment from her this morning, but deleted it without reading. I have more important shit to do than talk in circles because some dipshit has communication/comprehension problems and is too arrogant and obtuse to realise/admit they're wrong. Some people are just persecuted by the masses, u guiz
(Though like I told Kelly, I was having fun bonding with her and [livejournal.com profile] kiptripsyc over the massive fail we were collectively witnessing. It's terribly frustrating to spell a notion out to the exact letter and watch someone repeatedly Not Get It, but it was also hilarious. <3 you guys)

Emmy's watching Wonderpets for the first time in...weeks, at least. I was thinking she didn't like them anymore, which would have truly been sad--they have awesome songs, okay. It's also not terribly hot today, same yesterday, so I'm thinking tomorrow it'll probably be a billion degrees with a hundred and forty seven percent humidity. Having to be at work an extra half-hour because of our new mandatory unpaid meal breaks sucks, though today I started listening to It, and the huge huge long almost teal deer intros to each of the main characters passed most of the time. I was really pissed for about two hours because I had to move to someone else's station so someone else could use mine, as clients were visiting, and the one I had to sit at had an entirely different keyboard, which I loathed. The screen was also lower, which meant I had to crane my neck all around, and my neck and back really started to hurt after like ten minutes. And, of course, it took me a week and a half to log into the fucking system, and because we only have that half-hour break, the time it took for the system to accept my passwords and such counted against my productivity. Argh.

I'm still so far behind on reading...I've skimmed most of the stuff I've seen posted, but I haven't had time (even before my exercise in futility last night) to read thoroughly and comment yet, so I'll save it for when I can give something other than "I RED DIS". I've written a few things, but they're not ready to be posted yet. I'd really like to get this one piece I started months ago finished, but it seems like every time I open it, the characters involved go "BRB READING WAR AND PEACE. IN BRAILLE~" or something. TRUST ME YOU GUYS, YOU WANT TO FINISH THIS SCENE. (Of course, they have no trouble whatsoever going through it in my head while I'm a work and can't write anything down, jerks)

Here are some other thoughts:

~ ...the Wonderpets are putting oil on a dinosaur.
~ Mmm, cashews
~ Quizno's > Subway. Not in nutrition/weight loss capabilities, but definitely in taste.
~ I was going to buy moar tea vodka, but then I didn't. THIS WEEKEND, THOUGH
~ YES DUSTIN, I KNOW YOU WANT THE FLIPPING RIVER PICTURES
~ No more bird sightings in the house (SO FAR THIS WEEK). I figure two in twenty minutes is about the limit I can deal with for another five years. Yes, yes, at least they weren't bats...
~ I tried to clip Welly's claws last night, but some of them are like...splintering? Peeling? Idk :\ She didn't seem like they were bothering her, but I don't speak cat.
~ I almost seriously want to get a bb gun for the guys across the street that come rolling up with the bass in their speakers rattling my monitor on my desk. REALLY, YOU GUYS??
~ AND SEMAGIC ISN'T WORKING FOR POSTING arrr I hate using the "post entry" box.

Imma go put on a pizza for me and Emmy's dinner--last night I forgot to eat dinner and have only eaten a small frozen meal (turkey/cornbread stuffing/apples), so...idc, I'm eating pizza. And, um, broccoli. Yes.
longslowaccident: (Default)
OH GOD SO REMEMBER (some of you won't) IN 2005 WHEN THERE WERE BATS IN OUR APARTMENT

YEAH THERE WAS JUST A BIRD IN HERE

A BIG GIANT BLACK BIRD

AET4Y8Q34GWOIKA

oh my goddddd you guys omg omg omg omg omg

I heard it YAPPING/chittering in the laundry area, and thought it was the CATS talking to each other. Then Dustin's all "UM BIRD" and I'm like "WHAAA" and then it comes FLYING IN HERE

Illy and Finey were both trying to get it. Dustin says Illy had it on top of the dryer, but let it go for some reason. I gave Dustin the broom and he smacked it, then Illy attacked it again. There are blood and feathers on the rug in front of the door, where he swept it outside after brushing Illy away from it.

HOW DID IT GET IN HERE

IDEC, BIRD, YOU JUST GTFO


so that's about enough excitement for today, amirite


EDIT: APPARENTLY NOT, BECAUSE THERE WAS ANOTHER BIRD IN HERE:





NEED MOAR CATS
longslowaccident: (Default)


...I can't be the only one seeing the irony here.
longslowaccident: (Default)
Gah, dammit. I need these to hatch as fast as possible.



Just the views are fine, keep a'scrollin'.

Cats are doing well. I have pictures of them, and Emmy, and a bunch of meme answers I'll get to later.

My piece of Dove chocolate has just directed me to "Build a bridge and get over it!"
longslowaccident: (Default)


Is it just me, or does this, at least at first glance, look like it says something other than "flick"?

istg if I see "wet, messy, with a chance of earthquakes" me and the weather channel are going to become BFF
longslowaccident: (Default)
Oh yeah, and I also had a dream that [livejournal.com profile] subluxate and I were driving around San Francisco when we saw half of a building collapse.

Not like, fall over, but it seemed to just...sink down. We parked and watched, and like ten seconds later emergency personnel were arriving and trying to get people out. Next door was an old pawn shop, though, so we decided to go in and see what we could find. (Because going into a building connected to one that sunk down into the ground is always a great idea.) Kelly found two white sandals that she liked and was looking at beads to possibly make necklaces/bracelets out of, and asked the guy how much they were. He said something like $27 dollars...each. I looked at the sandals she was holding, which had a $1.50 sticker each, and told her to make sure if it was $1.50 for the PAIR or EACH. She said she didn't want them either way, and went to wait for me by the door, I guess pretty irritated at the owner guy. I went to look at a pile of books and records...I flipped one over and was like "oh lol, that guy looks like Mark", and it was Dave Mustaine. (Which is dumb, because while Mark's favourite band is Megadeth, he looks nothing like Dave Mustaine. Except for the blond hairs and guitars, I guess?) I put that one down and looked at another, which turned out to be this REALLY RARE M*A*S*H book. The price tag was $40. I was like "Man...I don't even like MASH that much any more" (which is untrue--I like it just as much, I'm just obsessed with it almost not at all) but flipped through it anyway. I found some sort of article on how Loretta Swit was REALLY involved with Alan Alda, and the whole two-part episode with Hotlips and Hawkeye trapped and thinking it was clearly SEXYTIMES was NOT PRETEND. I was just like WTFever and tossed it back down. Kelly didn't want it either, not for forty fucking dollars.

Then there was a bunch of stuff about kids fighting, a huge elevator that liked to make people think it was going to fall and crash, and a maze in which we could always see windows to the outside, but never actually made it there.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!

longslowaccident: (Default)
So today I read in the local newspaper that one of the guys charged in a shooting last year was kidnapped, severely beaten, and left for dead.

McFarland was scheduled to be sentenced March 25 in Clinton County District Court after pleading guilty to a charge stemming from a 2008 shooting incident at a mobile home park near DeWitt, Iowa.

My husband's father, stepmother, and two younger sisters live in DeWitt. In that mobile home park. When the shooting occurred (some guys in a car, firing into a trailer from it), his little sister Danielle was in her bedroom folding her laundry. Did I mention they live right next door, on the next lot, like thirty feet away from the trailer that was being fired into? Yeah.

Small towns in Iowa, huh?
longslowaccident: (Default)
The other day I ran into Wal-Mart to get a new package of socks for Emmy, since almost all of hers are way too small/missing. I was standing in the aisle for toddler socks and underpants, trying to choose between brands/designs/prices, when I overheard a conversation:

Girl: Does she make you wear it?
Guy: No. No, she doesn't make me. But I like it!
Girl: Dude, guys aren't supposed to wear them, though! It's special for girls.
Guy: Well, you come over here and rip it off me, then.
Girl: *giggles* No.
Guy: I just like it is all.
Girl: But you're not even married yet!
Guy: If she can wear one, so can I.

They were talking about him wearing a wedding band given to him by his fiancée. He had an engagement ring and was defending this to a friend/acquaintance, all while choosing baby products <3
longslowaccident: (Default)


I would watch Law & Order: Vending Machine Unit.

DOINK DOINK.

FOR NOW.

Feb. 20th, 2010 10:14 pm
longslowaccident: (Default)
Just finished watching The Skeleton Key with Kelly and Geena. Geena was very disappointed that a) ghost raccoons didn't do it and b) the song during the credits likely did not contain the lyrics "deep in my heart/there's a gremlin".

At least she's off of the gay porn pop-up book idea.
longslowaccident: (Default)
SO I GO TO UPLOAD THIS AWESOME GIF IN REPLY TO A POST OF GEENA'S

AND THEN THE PAGE LOOKS LIKE THIS



NO THANK YOU, I'M NOT QUITE SURE ~KIDS' BIRTHDAY PARTY~ IS THE THEME I WANNA GO WITH WHEN CHOOSING A PADDLE

I ALSO HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT LANGUAGE IT'S IN, OR HOW IT GOT THERE. IT USED TO BE GERMAN.

also doesn't my arrow look like an airplane
longslowaccident: (Default)


LOL FOREVER
longslowaccident: (Default)


...okay.


ps my state is awesome
longslowaccident: (Default)
Sooooo driving in post-Christmas traffic in a huge city is fun, right? We went to Davenport to try to do Emmy's Build-A-Bear (which went pretty well, she chose a grey ballerina kitty and fell asleep in the car with it)...and it was packed, of course. Getting out of the parking lot proved interesting.

We got in the car, and then couldn't back up because there was this old lady in a car directly behind ours. I thought she might've been waiting for another car to pull out so she could have their spot, but we couldn't see anyone else moving. There were lots of people walking in the middle of the roads though, so it would've been hard to back out, plus a lot of cars going around this old lady's car and zipping by. We couldn't get out because she was RIGHT behind us, and we sat there waiting, until Dustin finally opened his door and was like, "Um, can you move your car? Please?"

So, this old lady looks toward us, sees both of us looking, kind of throws her hands up and shakes her head in exasperation, puts her car into reverse and looks behind her...then proceeds to stomp on the gas and back up directly into the front of the truck that was waiting behind her.

UM OKAY

So then she pulls forward, gets out of her car, and goes over to the window of the truck, where another lady (35ish) had been driving and was now looking at her like "......". I saw the old lady start talking, flap her hands in our direction, then go back toward her car. The one in the truck got out and looked at the front of hers, called something about it only hitting her bumper, and got back in her truck. No, there wasn't any damage, but how did we enjoy that "UM HAY IT'S THAT GUY'S FAULT I BACKED INTO YOUR TRUCK EVEN THOUGH I WAS LOOKING OVER MY SHOULDER, BECAUSE I WAS SITTING BEHIND THEIR CAR AND NOT MOVING AND HE RUSHED ME".

Happy fucking New Year to you too, lady.
longslowaccident: (Default)
Emmy: [holds Santa hat on hand] Rrroar....rroar...
Me: [typing]
Emmy: Uh, Mom? Big scary monster, here?


She'll be four in three months. Her teenage years ought to be interesting.
longslowaccident: (Default)
From http://shaanmichael.tumblr.com/post/287043228:

“Has Uganda gone too far? Should there be any level of legislation against homosexuality? Should homosexuals be protected by legislation as they are in South Africa? What would be the consequences of this bill to you? How will homosexual ‘offences’ be monitored?,” the post added.

Premoderated posts included one from Chris, Guildford, posted at 8.59am, which attracted 51 recommendations of support. He wrote: “Totally agree. Ought to be imposed in the UK too, asap. Bring back some respectable family values. Why do we have to suffer ‘gay pride’ festivals? Would I be allowed to organise a ‘straight pride’ festival? No, thought as much!! If homosexuality is natural, as we are forced to believe, how can they sustain the species? I suggest all gays are put on a remote island somewhere and left for a generation - after which, theoretically there should be none left!”




Oh yeah, that's a great argument. Sure, people who are pro-gay rights claim it's natural, but since when do they claim it's the only way people are to be, like a lot of anti-gay rights people seem to infer? I don't know one pro-gay rights person who thinks every human is supposed to be homosexual, only that a percentage are (or one of the multitude of other different human sexualities and genders), and the only thing they seem to compile everyone into is the right to be treated the same as everyone else. Heterosexual people are the only ones I've ever seen telling people their way was the only way for everyone to be, and the only ones I've ever seen use this dumbass logic, which is just about as stupid as "DURR IF WE LET GAYS MARRY PEOPLE WILL MARRY COWS NEXT"

And, of course, it doesn't even make any fucking sense. Like we really need to go forth and populate the fucking Earth? I THINK WE'RE JUST ABOUT FULL-UP, PAL. Irresponsible teenagers and adults fuck around and get pregnant and abandon, abuse, or put their children up for adoption and clog the systems while foster care and adoptive homes go through intensive screening (especially gay couples, who don't even have the option of adopting in some states) and wait on three-year-long lists before they're ~granted~ a child. That dude is so right, gays are totally pointless because they can't have children. Everyone infertile or childless shouldn't be married either, and YOU'RE NEXT. COME ON YOU GUYS, BABIES ARE PRODUCTS OF MARRIAGE AND THE ONLY ONES THAT MAKE LIFELONG COMMITMENT TO ANOTHER PERSON WORTHWHILE

Profile

longslowaccident: (Default)
gandolforf

September 2010

S M T W T F S
    1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 91011
12131415161718
19202122232425
2627282930  

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Sep. 22nd, 2017 11:37 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios